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- "Oh hai, doggy!"
- Even funnier because the lady seems to be one line behind in the script.
- When Johnny has just had a fight with Lisa, and furiously talks to himself before noticing his friend Mark is there.
Johnny: I did nat heet her, it's naht true, it's bullshit! I did naht heet her! I did NAAAAAHT. Oh hai, Mark.
- "Anyway, how's your sex life?"
- This is uttered immediately after Johnny claims he can't talk to Mark about what's going on at work because "it's private".
- "And she's showing everybody me underwears."
- "You are tear-y mea PART Lees-ah!!"
- The fight scene for some strange reason. The dialogue by Johnny definitely helps.
- "Don tosh meh, motorfocker!"
- "I definitely have breast cancer!"
- "In a few minutes, bitch."
- The entire pot smoking scene.
- "Johnny doesn't drink!"
- "Where's my FUCKING MONEY DENNY!?!"
- "YOU'RE NOT MY FUCKING MOTHER!"
- "Chicken, Peter, you're just a little chicken. Cheep-cheep-cheep-cheep-cheep-cheep-cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep."
- Even more hilariously brought up later with, "You betray me, you no good. You just a chicken - cheep-cheep-cheep-cheep-cheep." He also looks stiff as a board when he does the chicken movements.
- "What a story Mark." It's how badly dubbed it is and how inappropriate the laugh is for the story that makes it hilarious.
- "Wow, you look great! You look... a baby face..."
- Another great piece of dialogue:
Lisa: He got drunk last night and he hit me.
Michelle: He hit you?!
Lisa: I don't want to marry him anymore.