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"Never use old slang. Slang, to be enjoyable, must be fresh."
Ernest Hemingway, Kansas City (Mo.) Star Manual of Style
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"The best part of getting older is gonna be intentionally misusing slang around teenagers just to make them squirm."
Xkcd
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It was a gnarly day for extreme-minded dropout Harry Stoner when a totally brutal wipeout left his skin fused with the street. He then somehow got super-strength and became known as Cobblestone.
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Three Rad Dudes/ with nothing better to do/ were abducted by the crew/ of the Starship Alpha-2// They're from the planet Q/ Which due to a time loop/ is stuck in '82// They need our heroes to review/ the latest shows and tv news/ and games and movies// We hope you're not confused/ we swear this is all true/ and not the premise to...
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Doctor: I'm trying to be relatable.

Miley: To what, the 1970s?
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Fred: Every time you turn around they've changed the language! How are we supposed to keep up?
Marie: Oh, don't be such a buzz crusher!
Fred: Wha--?
Black-haired brownie troop girl: Killjoy! Party pooper! Wet blanket!
Fred: That does it!! What was wrong with last year's lingo?
Marie: It was last year's!!
Fred: What happened to hip, hep, jerk, nerd, wimp?
Melissa: Totally random, sir!
Fred: Huh?
Archie: That means, it makes no sense, pop!

Fred: Neither does this conversation!!
Archie Comics, "Lingo Lesson"
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Mary Jane Watson: Well pierce my ears and call me drafty!
Spider-Man #62
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A.R.: You are ripping up so many hellaceous shreds this fierceshitty biznasty is getting so deliriously rudebrazen it... Ok you lost the handle on that sentence.
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Jessie: (disguised as a Valley Girl) It'll be a radical party! All of the most radical Pokemon trainers will be there!

Ash Ketchum: (to Misty) Do you know anyone who says "radical" anymore?
Pokémon, "Battle Aboard the St. Anne"
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This sort of thing is what happens when a bunch of white shut-ins try to be hip. [Beat] And do so with fish.
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"Dude, your slang is so totally bogus and outdated."
Noah "Spoony" Antwiler on Party Mania
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"Characters are written with the hip slang of 1993 in mind, as interpreted by clueless middle-aged men."
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‘See’ Jonas said to O’Neill. ‘There’s a passage over there which says Ra is a righteous dude and Anubis is bogus’ he declared, pointing to the far wall.

‘Now I know you’re making this up’ O’Neill responded disbelievingly.
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Mom: what viol8s code?
Reg: The fact that you just spelled “violates” as “viol8s” causes me physical pain.

Mom: i txt liek the cool kids
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Seriously, dad, who says "dude" any more?
Josh Stevenson, Waterloo Road
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anon1: >Heck yes!
anon1: >Good spot! Ain't it cool!?
anon1: >You betcha!
anon1: >Loads!
anon1: >Thanks for noticing!
anon1: >We got loads of awesome stuff!
anon1: Who the fuck did GeeDubs hire for their PR? A hambeast tumblrina? I kinda miss the old corporate soulless GW who treated you like a goyim, at least they weren't fucking insultingly patronizing and pretending they're your friend.
anon2: it's basically the new "hello fellow youths" crap
anon3: it's like pic related. [screenshot of a rant mocking Gearbox Software random attempts at "humor" in games as "insecure 12 years old filter"] When I first started using the GW website, I was like, hey, a little bit of flavour text here and there aint so bad, but now we're getting to gearbox level writing.

from /tg/
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